


When a Lie would do

by SilverScaler3000



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Adopted Loki (Marvel), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anger, Angst, Anxiety, Awkwardness, Birds, Cookies, Crying, Deception, F/M, Fights, Flirting, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hot Chocolate, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, LGBTQ Themes, Lies, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Misunderstandings, Odin (Marvel)'s Good Parenting, Parent Death, Revelations, Self-Esteem Issues, Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2019-10-01 16:16:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17247395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverScaler3000/pseuds/SilverScaler3000
Summary: "I used to think, about what's real and trueWhat cannot be proven, what can be assumedOnce when I was younger, in the bloom of youthI received an honest answer...When a lie would do."- Tracy ChapmanAdopted. Loki was fucking adopted. Adopted, as in his parents… weren’t really his parents. Adopted, as in Thor, whom he had grown up with and had called his brother with both affection and scorn, wasn’t really his brother. Adopted, as in his biological parents hadn’t wanted him, abandoned him on Odin’s doorstep, and had left him to an unknown fate like he was nothing but trash.Adopted.





	1. The Letter

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sparcina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sparcina/gifts).



> (I hope you enjoy it Sparcina. You've created some of my favorite Forstiorn's, I just wanted to give a little sometin' back ; >)
> 
> The lyrics I have in the description are from a song titled "Thinking of you", by Tracy Chapman - one of my favorite singers of all time. I would highly recommend listening to the song, its such a haunting melody.
> 
> Happy new year!!!

_Fuck._

That was all Loki could think. Over and over again, a pathetic mantra in his head that wouldn't,  _couldn't_ be silenced. He could feel, dully, that his lips were moving with the word his mind kept forming, but he wasn’t sure if he was actually saying it aloud or not. He grit his teeth, forcing his mouth to still. Now was  _not_ the time nor the place to allow himself a mental breakdown, damn it!

He clenched the chains of the swing, fighting the pathetic whimpers and angry curses his body demanded he cry out. “Compose yourself!” he hissed angrily.

The crack of a twig nearby made him start, and he snapped his head up. His eyes darted around wildly, heart pounding in his throat as he tried to determine the source of the noise. He relaxed after a moment, realizing that it was simply someone jogging on the path behind him. The moment they passed, not even bothering to spare him a glance, he let out a sigh of relief, rubbing a hand over his face in exasperation. This was the fifth time he had let himself jump like a scared rabbit; worried that somehow Thor, or god forbid fath- _Odin_ , had found him, but it was always just a random pedestrian walking by the park.

Loki groaned quietly with frustration, and it slowly changed into a low growl. He grimaced as it threatened to become a pitiful whine. He had really done it now, and it was a sick, tiny, _pathetic_ thing compared to everything he had ever wanted to do.

Loki had just run off.

Walked out of his house, left his phone, his wallet, and hadn't stopped walking until he didn't know where he was anymore. It had taken all day, and by the time he had finally paused to rest and figure out where he was, he had been utterly exhausted. But at least now he could  _think_. Process everything he had learned, and let it do more than just sit and turmoil in his chest like a dying scream.

Adopted.

He was fucking  _adopted._

Adopted, as in his parents… weren’t really his parents.

Adopted, as in Thor, whom Loki had grown up with and had called his brother with both affection and scorn, wasn’t really his brother.

Adopted, as in his biological parents hadn’t wanted him; abandoned him on Odin’s doorstep, and had left him to an unknown fate like he was nothing but  _trash_.

Loki felt a lump lodge itself in his throat, but the thoughts didn’t stop there.

Adopted, as in his mother - could he even call her that anymore? - had begged Odin to let her keep him, to raise him as her own and never tell Loki of his true origins.

_Adopted._

Sighing bitterly, he glanced up at the empty playground. It was completely devoid of children, or anyone else for that matter, besides himself. Loki found the solitude rather comforting. The quiet sounds of nature had always had a soothing effect on him, a result of having often slipped out of his house as a child to escape Thor and his friends. He remembered how he would climb over fallen trees, collect mushrooms and other fungi to study, and sometimes, on especially hot days, even visit a small creek that he could wade into.

He listened tentatively, letting the gentle lull of nature become more than just white noise. Slowly other sounds tinkered in, and it made Loki smile. Birds were singing all around him, and as he listened carefully, Loki realized he could name a few of them by their calls. A majority of them were robins, but a few cardinals and even the occasional blue jay made themselves known from the canopy of trees. He smiled as a red-winged blackbird’s trill cut through the twilight, and he couldn’t help but think of the first time mother had ever pointed them out to him.

They were...  _had_ been her favorite bird, after all.

He gripped the swing tighter, biting his bottom lip. Memories brushed almost lazily through his mind; sights, sounds and smells he knew he’d probably never be rid of, not even as death reached for him with its ice-cold fingers.

There were good memories; the way Frigga smelled of books and freshly baked bread, her smile that could always make Loki give one in return.

But then there were also the bad memories.

The horrible chemical smell from the hospital; lights flashing on machines that had monitored Frigga’s health as her end drew near.

The sound of glass  _shattering_ as his mother told him, so unbearably calmly, that she was dying.

It rang clear through his mind, making him shudder. It had only been a few short years ago, and yet he couldn’t remember what the glass had looked like, nor how far it’s broken remains had scattered on the kitchen floor. Only the sound, echoing endlessly back at him from the depths of his soul.

He winced, shaking his head. Why was it always the smallest things that created the largest pains? The grief he had endured for months after Frigga’s death, the betrayal he felt now from the revelation of his true origins, were somehow nothing compared to the tiniest pieces of Frigga’s final days that had managed to embed themselves in his chest, twisting his happiness into the ugliest forms pain could take.

Lightly, he pushed the ground with his foot so he swung back and forth, the swing screeching lightly in protest. If he closed his eyes, Loki could almost imagine he was sitting in his mother’s lap as she sat on the old rocking chair at home, leaning back in the safety of her arms as she hummed something soothing to him.

He tried to chuckle fondly, but it came out as more of a sob. Loki bit his hand, fighting desperately against hysterics. How could his mother do this to him? Frigga was the most understanding, most compassionate and wonderful person he had ever know. How could she tell him through a letter, a fucking _letter_ , that he was a bloody reject!? A stray Odin had only tolerated all these years because she had made him!?

A letter, he might add, that Odin was  _supposed_ to have given him shortly after his eighteenth birthday, and had very conveniently forgotten to. Hela,  _that **bitch**_ , had found it in the jewelry box she had inherited from Frigga, and had chosen now, of all the fucking times, to give it to him.

 _"Mom left you somethin', brat. Or rather, **my** mom, left you this._"

Using breathing exercises he had been utilizing since he was a child, Loki he managed to calm down and regain his composure. Reaching with shaking fingers into his pocket, he pulled out the crumpled sheet of paper. He cringed at how crinkled it was now, and he smoothed it to the best of his abilities. Frigga’s intricate handwriting, familiar and beautiful, made him smile softly. He traced it lightly with his fingertips, feeling somehow more connected to her from the touch. Her last words to him, forever contained on this little sheet. They held nothing but love for him, but offered him little solace for the horrible truths she had chosen to reveal through pen rather than spoken words.

And now, with her gone, no one wanted him.  _No one._

He pushed his foot down to halt the swing, wondering, vaguely, how Thor would take the news. He would probably be relieved; was most likely already celebrating with all of his stupid friends. He hadn’t been at home out when Loki had left, but he would have surely been told by now.

_Adopted_

He was nothing but an embarrassment to Thor. Why would he feel anything other than relief that the younger brother he had always shoved away, teased and taunted at the prompting of Hela and the ignorance of Odin, wasn’t even related to him? 

_Adopted_

He was garbage; pathetic, unwanted-

**_Adopted_ **

“ _Fuck,_ ” Loki hissed. “FUCK!”

He leaped off of the swing and fell onto his knees, hands pulling his hair as he screamed nothings at the world around him.

Tears burned hot tracks down his cheeks and tainted the earth below while sobs wracked his body. He removed his hands from his hair to press them into the earth, digging his fingers beneath the wood chips to the dirt below as he tried desperately to ground himself. He couldn’t let himself fall like this! Damn what Odin and Thor thought, he was stronger and smarter than either of them. He was Loki Odinso- _Loki_ , Loki, and Loki alone, and he would sooner die than let himself succumb to his emotions like this!

After he had finally caught his breath, Loki glanced up. No one was there. No one to mock him for his outburst, to sneer at his disgruntled appearance. But there was also no one there to give a damn about him.

He sighed, reaching behind himself for Frigga’s letter….

It was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> COMMENTS ARE LOVE!!!


	2. The Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki nearly dies - sort of - Tony flirts, shenanigans ensue, but what else is new?
> 
> (hehehe, that rhymed, I like having fun around here)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wraaa! I'm a zombie, FEAR ME!
> 
> I kid, I kid. ; )
> 
> I didn't die, I've just been super busy, and, most recently, sick as a dog. Seeing as how I'm leaving the US this Saturday for Guatemala, I procrastinated and finished this chapter for you! I'm also hoping to get the first chapter for a new frostiron fic up tomorrow - it's such a smutty doozie, I'm really excited about it. 
> 
> Welp! Let's get to it!

“Dad, look I- _no_ , no, I am not going to apologize for that, she was being a fucking-”

Tony yanked the phone away from his ear as his father yelled at him, sighing in exasperation. Wasn’t this a charmingly familiar scenario: Tony Stark, sitting in the back of the least flashiest limo his family owned, Jarvis at the wheel, graciously enduring yet another shouting match between father and son that could only be taken through the phone. Never, ever _,_ face to face.

 _Ever_.

Once he was sure Howard’s shouting had quieted down enough for him to be heard, Tony brought the phone back to his face. “Dad, come on,” he said, “All I did was-”

Another short wait was endured as his phone practically bounced in his hand, the speakers working overtime to compensate for Howard’s screams of outrage.

“Yeah, yeah,” Tony said placatingly after about five minutes, “I know how,” he rolled his eyes, _Important_ that party was, but I couldn’t just let her get away with-” 

More screaming, and Tony clenched his jaw. “You can’t expect me to- I’m not gonna- _Howard would you_ ** _just_** …”

He trailed off, realizing the other end of the line had gone silent. “Dad?” he asked quietly. 

No response came, and the teen stared down at his phone, scowling. “He hung up,” Tony said, letting it slide dejectedly out of his hand and onto the seat of the car. 

Jarvis met his eyes in the rearview mirror, his brow furrowed sympathetically. “I’m sure he will come to understand, sir.”

Tony scoffed. “Right, and the U.S. government will finally take global warming seriously. Be real, J.” He shifted in his seat so he was glaring out the window.

He hadn’t really have a destination in mind when he had asked Jarvis to take him for a drive, so the butler had decided to visit the neighborhood he grew up in. Tony thought it was all very picturess; lots of homes with well kept yards - sans the occasion toy or bike lying in a flower bed for some poor parent to clean up later. Tony had to admit, it looked rather peaceful. Much more peaceful than the dumpster fire of a situation he had left at home, anyhow. He sighed.

“I’m not going to go crawling back on my hands and knees to say sorry to someone that doesn’t deserve it,” he muttered. “Howard doesn’t care that Amora was being a bitch and totally had it coming, he just wants me to apologize because of the deal he’s trying to make with her Mother’s company.”

It wasn’t even that big a transaction to begin with. Losing a partnership with _Enchanting Devices_ \- ugh, the name made Tony feel like throwing up every time he heard it - would hardly be any skin off the Stark Company’s nose.

“Sir, while I agree she was out of turn, I don’t believe that having the _sprinkler system_ ,” Tony could tell Jarvis was holding back a small smile, “Attack her, was one of your brightest moves.”

Tony couldn’t help but chuckle at the memory. “Yeah, but the look on her face? Makeup running down her cheeks and onto her dress? That’s not a sight I’m ever gonna forget.”

“All the same, you should do as your father asks.”

Tony’s smile fell. “No,” he said flatly. 

“But Sir-”

“But what, J?” Tony snapped. “My dignity and the dignity of every other bi man aside, apologizing isn’t going to do shit for how dad thinks of me, and-” he stopped short, pressing his forehead against the limo window as he stared in horror at the scene unfolding outside. 

“Sir?” Jarvis asked.

“Oh, oh shit,” Tony sputtered. “Jarvis, Jarvis wait, stop! Jarvis there’s a guy _falling out of a tree_ -”

 

 

“Fuck!” Loki screamed, barely catching himself on a branch in time. 

It jarred him to grab it the way he did; one armpit and one frantically clawing hand, only barely managing to keep himself from what would surely be a terrific, bone breaking landing. He gasped as some of the bark pulled back under his fingernails, whimpering as he nearly lost his grip. 

“Oh, _Gods_ ,” he moaned, limbs shaking from both fear and exertion. 

Swinging his legs frantically, the teen nearly sobbed with relief when his feet finally found a branch below him, possibly large enough to set himself down on. Carefully, he let his full weight settle onto it, continuing to hold the one above him, just in case it turned out the one his feet were on wasn’t, in fact, strong enough to sustain his weight. He wasn’t going to make the same mistake again and let go of the branch prematurely. At least, not until he was absolutely, positively sure this one _wasn’t_ going to break. 

Determining that it wouldn’t, he sagged, limbs screaming in protest as the adrenaline wore off. Once his breath was caught, Loki began to swear colorfully; strings of curses spilling from his mouth as he glanced down in order to determine just how far he had fallen. Not too far, it seemed, perhaps only a few feet. 

He heard an indignant caw above him, and Loki scowled as he glared up at the bird in question. “You mewling quim!” he screeched at it. It only gave him another throaty caw before flying off, leaving Loki alone in the tree.

Only mere seconds after he had realized Frigga’s letter was missing, Loki had sighted it _and_ the culprit who had taken it. A raven - Odin’s favorite bird no less, Gods damn that man! - had grabbed it and flown the paper up to its nest at the top of a gigantic pine. 

Furious - and more than a little panicked - Loki had scaled the tree, desperate to retrieve the last piece of his mother that he had. The raven had been stubborn to give up it’s prize, however, and it pecked relentlessly at his hands. It wasn’t until Loki had made a daring leap and mad grab that he had finally had finally managed to grab it. 

...and that had been when the branch broke from under him. 

He shuddered again, adrenaline still pumping in his veins. Hopefully, no one had witnessed him making a fool of himself like that.

Hopefully.

 

 

“Thank fuck,” Tony breathed as he watched the guy righten himself in the tree. That could have ended badly. 

After he had made Jarvis stop the car, Tony had dashed out, too little too late to really do anything other than run as he watched the guy nearly become a pancake on the sidewalk below the tree. Now that he was only a few feet away from it though, he noticed something lying on the ground, right at the base of the trunk. He frowned, walking closer. It was a piece of paper, and as he picked it up, Tony could hear a hissed: _Shit! Where is it!?_

"I'm going to, _go out on a_ _limb_ , here," Tony called up, "And guess that this is yours?" 

He smirked as the boy’s eyes snapped down to meet his, cheeks turning a rather cute shade of pink. Tony barely stopped the _awe_ that wanted to leave his mouth at the sight, finding the flush teen utterly adorable. Then the guy caught sight of the paper in Tony’s hand, and immediately embarrassment was replaced with relief so raw Tony couldn’t help but feel happy in the face of it.

 

 

Loki, meanwhile, could feel himself nodding, although he wasn't sure what part of his mind had given the command to do so. His thoughts had all turned to static the second he had laid eyes on the boy below him, completely enrapt in the young man’s eyes. They were a breathtakingly beautiful shade of brown, sparkling with mischief that mirrored Loki’s own. They had him so enrapt that he hardly noticed the young man’s handsome face, charming smile- 

Alright, so maybe he was paying attention to more than just the boy's eyes. _Too much_ _attention_ , he quickly realized. “Y-yes,” he finally stuttered. “Thank you for retrieving it.”

“Anytime, gorgeous.” 

Loki’s mouth fell open soundlessly, and he had to tighten his grip on the branch before he fell. What did- who in their right mind, _why_ -

“So, you want this? Or should I…” 

Loki swallowed. “Wait just a moment, please,” he requested, glancing around himself for a strong branch to place his foot on. “I’ll be with you shortly.” 

 

 

Tony watched as the boy climbed down the tree, jumping the last few feet so that he stood in front of him. Tony could tell now that the boy was taller than him, but that didn’t deter him. He stuck both hands stuck into his jeans pockets as he leaned back against the trunk, giving the teen one of Tony’s world famous smiles. “Name’s Tony,” he said, sticking his hand out. 

 

 

Loki blinked, then extended his own hand to be shaken. “Loki,” he murmured, trying not to blush. 

Tony frowned, and Loki felt something akin to panic bubbling in his chest. Had, had he done something wrong?

“Are you alright?” Tony asked gently.

Loki’s breath caught in his throat, and he brought his remaining hand to his cheek. He felt himself turn beet red once he realized that the tear streaks were still visible on his face, probably along with his frazzled hair and red eyes. “I’m fine,” he growled, yanking his hand out of Tony’s grasp. “Now, Star please return my letter so that we can part ways.”

Tony’s eyes narrowed, but he obliged, handing Frigga’s letter over slowly. 

Loki tried not to snatch it, but it was a very close thing. Once it was back in his possession, however, he sighed with relief. Holding it tightly to his chest, he opened his mouth to thank Tony once again and apologize for getting angry, but was cut off. 

“And if I don’t want to ‘part ways’, as you put it?”

Loki stilled, staring at the teen uncertainly. “I beg your pardon?” he asked, sure he had heard wrong. He squawked indignantly when, rather than answer him, Tony grabbed Loki’s wrist and began dragging him towards-

Was that a fucking limousine!?

 

 

“Start driving, J,” Tony said as he pulled Loki into the car with him. 

Jarvis raised an eyebrow at the pair of them, before sighing and nodding. “Your companion is joining us then, Sir?” he asked. 

Loki and Tony both responded at the same time, giving completely different answers. Jarvis gave Tony a condescending look; both from Loki’s response and no doubt from the growing panic in the teens expression, but Tony waved him off. 

”Just get us home before dad realizes it’s too soon for me to come creeping back in. This guy needs some serious Ana-nanna type comfort.”

“Really now,” Loki tried to protest, I don’t know what you think your doing, but-”

“I’m afraid,” Jarvis cut in, “That Anthony takes after his father a little too much in the, ‘ _Starks are made of Iron’_ , mantra the family seems so obsessed with. I assure you, young sir, that once Sir is sure you’re alright, he won’t detain you anymore.”

 

 

The man’s voice was quiet, kind, and, unfortunately, Tony was very adept at giving him puppy-dog eyes. Only, unlike Thor’s, these were actually having an affect on him. Loki groaned. “Fine,” he ground out. “But I want you to know that I-”

Wait, that name. Stark. 

Like, Maria and Howard Stark. 

Like - “Tony Stark?”

Loki watched as Tony sighed, then nodded. “The one and only,” he muttered. 

 _Holy_ **_fuck_** _._

He thinks he might have said that aloud. The look on Tony’s face - a deep, hard grimace that didn’t suit him at all, in Loki’s opinion - confirms that he did. Before he could apologize for apparently upsetting the teen, Tony asked the driver to head home once more. This time, the man listened, and Loki could only sit there, wondering just what he had just gotten himself into as they left the park, the swingset, the Raven and it’s tree, behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was it good? I'm still kinda in that weird, groggy state your body goes into when it's still trying to recover from an illness, and I'm not sure if this chapter is actually good... 
> 
> Or if my lethargic mind is being a piece of shit. 
> 
> Leave a comment, AND! If you have any advice for my trip, such as customs/laws you think I should be aware of, insults in Spanish you think I should know, etc, please tell me!
> 
> Read ya later!!!


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